26.

I feel really grateful for the people I’ve chosen to do life with. Every connection is intentional. Intentionality is a part of all aspects of my life. I’m never just going with the flow–this of course is a blessing and a curse. But, these souls I’ve aligned myself with are exactly who I want(need) to journey with. 

I’m grateful for space–to be and become. Space to fall apart and reassemble, to question and be certain, to learn and unlearn, to speak up and hold back. I’m thankful for the spaces I’ve created for myself and the ones that have been created on my behalf. Because life can be both simple and tasking, I struggle to hold my head high at all times. I’m learning to accept the spaces that have been created for me to fall apart. 

As a person, I struggle with asking for and accepting assistance. But life is funny because it has steered me to a place where assistance is paramount for my survival and I continue to do the daily dance of tug of war. I believe I must learn the lessons of this chapter to thrive in the next but I refuse to believe that I’m being tested because I am strong. I refuse to believe that my willingness to keep going is the reason why the hailstorm won’t cease. 

I continue to push forward, eager to see how this story ends and holding on to those I want on the other side of the chaos. 

Soulmates.

Dee: Do you think everyone has one soulmate?
Me: No, I don’t.

I don’t think there’s such a thing as a soulmate. Of course, certain souls gravitate towards each other and there’s undeniable chemistry but it’s understandable if someone experiences that only once in a lifetime and that forces them to believe there’s only one soulmate out there for them.

Personally, I think you do yourself a huge disservice thinking that. There are so many amazing souls out there to connect with but we’re either too guarded or too in our own heads to discover that.

I also think there are different kinds of soulmates. Not just that person you fall head over heels in love with and want to spend the rest of your life with. You have those people that keep you in awe of how well your minds connect and how easily you accept each other. It’s important to acknowledge the difference and respect it.