So proud to be African but growing up amongst such a strong people forces you to conceal certain parts of your character and deal with situations differently.
We all have challenges and obstacles in life. Just like those vary, so will the approach of different individuals in dealing with them. Now, when you’re told ‘Panic and depression is not an African thing’ what do you do if that’s what your personality permits? Pretend. Pretend you’re different, pretend you’re stronger than you really are, pretend you’re not breaking down because you’re African and you’re meant to be strong and immovable.
What happens to our men? Boys that grew up being taught that to be a man you need to be strong and not show weakness because even if Africans are wired strongly, there’s a crack in the books that permits females to be emotional. Now, we have boys that have become men wrapping their masculinity in their inability to express emotions.
I love the strength of our continent and its people but shouldn’t we be strong enough to be individuals, strong enough to feel and express ourselves the way we deem fit regardless of our gender and not be afraid of being judged or appearing weak?
The fear of aging has forced me down memory lane. I’ve spent the last couple of days figuring out what life really is. After all the headaches and long nights, the truth is, life is short. Too short to even waste it thinking about the essence of living. I appreciate everyday I have because I’ve known people who didn’t get the chance to do the same. They fell off. Most of them not by their own doing but they fell off regardless. The people who loved them and they loved in return, moved on. I’m not an exception. That alone makes you wonder why you fight so hard to hold on to people that would eventually move on if you happen to fall off. Relationships are important, yes. Having people to love and care about is amazing but do you really need to lose yourself in the quest of holding on to them. I don’t think so. Live a life were you appreciate everyone for all they bring into your life and you’re able to reciprocate but bear in mind that it won’t last forever and when you get to the end of the road with a particular person or group of people, you have to be willing to accept change and growth. Be willing to let people go because maybe, just maybe their job has been completed in your life and you need new people to start playing new roles. We always fight to have our walls up but what’s really the point? What do we really gain from preventing ourselves from experiencing the amazing personalities the world’s trying to bring into our lives?
We’re all growing and evolving. Most times, it’ll steer us away from the norm we used to know. This growth will introduce us to a redefined version of ourselves and that’s great. We need to own it and follow the new path that’s right for us. It might cause a little pain and strain but that’s okay too. Eventually, everything will fall into place. We’re all unfinished puzzles even though we might hate to admit it. We don’t have it all figured out but time will mend us. There’s no doubt about that.
I’m over my fear of aging. I’m just looking forward to what the years ahead bring me and the angles they let me explore.